Higher the Hair, Closer to God

As many of your probably know, I have been conducting an independent study on Fundamental Mormonism and Polygamy, so this roadtrip was a dream come true because it offered the chance to drive through Short Creek - modernly known as Hildale, UT/Colorado City, AZ. We left Vegas after a fantastically hungover lunch at In-and-Out Burger and hit the road north to St. George and hit three states before we headed south again into Arizona and into the cradle of Mormon Fundamentalism and the home of Warren Jeffs' FLDS. 

While there we wanted to witness the way these people live and see first hand if the media has portrayed them accurately. What we found truly confirmed all suspicions about this sect. The homes were 5 times the size of normal homes - plenty of room for several dozen wives and children. After cruising up and down the streets of Colorado City four or five times we knew we were in the right place. We spotted several 

young FLDS girls with slurpees and then got photographic evidence of what appears to be a 14-year-old with a baby. This was one of our favorite shots that Erin took with her telephoto lens as we did the creepy slow driveby half a dozen times. Please note, the buffont hair, "modest dress" and sensible shoes. In honor of our friends in Colorado City, Erin decided to try out the hairstyle. I was afraid she was going to get picked up by a polygamist and leave me to drive to Texas all by myself, but if that meant that I inherited Doug then I guess it would have been ok. I guess Erin's hair wasn't actually to scale, because we didn't get any offers. You can be the judge for yourself on her craftsmanship. Notice the prayerful stance. That didn't help either. Let me tell 

you there is some pretty hysterical video of our time amongst the FLDS - it will be uploaded later - but lets just say, I was pretty freaked out that we were going to get attacked or pulled over or stoned or something. Erin had to quote our friend Megan and remind me to "be cool." 

All in all, I have to say it was a successful trip. I can now write confidently in my academic paper that I have witnessed in person the oppressed lifestyle of these people. At least we made it out of town with out Erin trying to "rescue" one of these poor girls. There isn't much room in the Mini and that would have been awkward.